Thursday, October 8, 2009

Give Me Life

I've felt like a slug for days now. I don't feel rested. I have done what absolutely needs to be done, but not one thing more. I've spent hours reading romance novels. I've avoided activities that would bring me closer to my goals. I've filled the evenings with TV season premiers--and haven't even gotten to the Ken Burn's National Parks series yet.

Could be the change in weather. Fall is settling into the Carolinas with lingering shadows and dark, cool mornings. Makes me want to hibernate. Could be a natural break from a busy September and lots of soul searching to uncover the right path for the next few months.

I have tried to add a spiritual discipline to my day. Each afternoon, I try to fit in a half-hour practicing my guitar and singing praise songs and hymns that come from my modern Catholic-Anglican heritage. It's my daily meditation, my prayer. I decided to add reading the psalm of the day and a New Testament verse for the day before practice. It's a way to revisit the Word on a more regular basis.

And here is Psalm 119, verses 145-176, and a recurring line that jumps up off the page. From the New American Standard:
Revive me, O Lord, according to your lovingkindness.
Revive me, O Lord, according to your ordinances.
Revive me according to your Word.
I immediately thought of lines from two of my favorite hymns: "Hear our cry, and revive us, O Lord!" and "Lord, light the fire, again."

Yeah, that's what I'm needing right now.

Lord, light a fire under me to get me off the couch.
Pull me through this wilderness of my own design.
Reactivate me with a clear vision of what I'm meant to do, where my efforts are best directed.
Let your Spirit surge through me again, so that I can continue on the Way with renewed vigor and fresh energy.
Restore my faith in your positive spin on the world.
Remind me that, out of the still waters of my rest, I'm here to make positive ripples, joyful splashes.

Lord, give me life.

May it be so. Amen.


  1. Perfect, LaVerne! It scares me how often you hit me exactly where I am!

  2. Very comforting to know I'm not the only one. Thanks!

  3. Hey LaVerne,
    Don't be to hard on yourself. One image of God's love that helps me get through those desert periods is of a carrousel. Some of the seats go up and down while others stay planted on the ground. But they all go round and round at the same pace. The carrousel fueled by God's love is equal for all, all the time. Whether we choice to climb up on the high horse or seat peacefully and watch for a while. Seat tight, . . . renew, you will be back up on that horse soon enough.